If You Can Only See

This weekend served as a great reminder for me that I am simply AWESOME 🙂

Pagbigyan na sana ako. You see, I had my 29th birthday last Sunday. 29. Wow. I’m at the edge of being in my “late 20’s”, and come next year, I will be 30. Whoooooosaaaa. How time flies, haha!

Healing from something that happened to me recently, it has been quite a struggle to find the normalcy in my life for the past couple of months. But I guess I am really blessed like this: people in my life are constantly reminding me of the good things about ME and the great things that are yet to come for me, not just because I am who I am or what I do but simply because of how much God loves me. More than not losing hope in the future, this really helped me find my focus once again. I guess it’s true when they say that first and foremost, do not forget to fall in love with yourself first. So for the past weeks, I have been channeling all my energy in improving my relationship with the Lord, giving my best in my work and finding more time to pursue my passion and the dreams that I may have set aside for a while. This includes writing, hence the new domain name for my blog. 🙂

Going back, it was this weekend when I was slapped in the face with this realization:

god

Normally, I am not really the easiest person to surprise. I guess I’m assuming that way? I always detect if something was up. I love surprises, and even when I do get surprised, I’d always remember that I somehow had an idea early on. But this weekend, my brother and my friends really got me!

I thought I was just meeting my girls for dinner and birthday salubong in Ortigas, and they even offered for me to ride with them. I emphasized how much I like that it was going to be a “low key night”. On the way, Rela told me she needs to pass by Astoria to bring something, and when we got down she asked me to come with her. I left my bag in the car thinking we’ll just be quick — and when the door opened, SUPRISE!!! It was my relatives, friends, our whole barkada, my boss, the wedding team, and of course my kuya, standing with a cake in hand. I was sooooo surprised and happy!

At 29, I didn’t think I still will be receiving gifts — but I did, plenty of them too! With them came notes and letters that made me really happy. I love letters. I love love letters. 🙂 Heartfelt messages too! It felt really good to be surrounded by people who love me enough to brave the rains and the floods of the metro just to spend time with me. It felt good to be reconnected to people I have detached myself to for a while. All I can think of that night was “Grabe ka Lord! Iba ka talaga!!!”

I think birthdays remind us of that sense of awesomeness within us — especially when you spend it with positive, energetic people who believe in you and appreciate you for who you are.  And contemplating on this after everyone left, I came to realize that God gave me that wonderful party to help remind me of how He sees me. Using my loved ones as living affirmations of how He sees me, and how I should see myself, not just during my birthday, but everyday, I thought, this is what everyone needs! When you’re down and burnt out, when you feel taken for granted and unappreciated, or when someone whom you thought thinks the world of you suddenly leaves you… You should just remember HOW GOD SEES YOU. You’ll be reminded that you are loved and cherished, that you are gifted with passion and skills and heart that no one else has. It’s part of human nature to want to feel and be affirmed of these things and we don’t need to look so far, because God gives these to us every single day!

After that weekend, I plan to pay it forward. I know I can be a good friend when I want to, but I want (as much as I can) to be a source of positive energy and encouragement to everyone I encounter. I think I am a bit shy and it can take a lot for me to open up, but if there’s a chance I can make anyone feel the way I felt that night, I’d take that chance to make someone smile.

So cheers to another year (for me) and for more people to meet, greet and inspire! 🙂

 

 

 

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